Mmmmm. Now here's hoping the David and Alex part feels like falling out of your head, too.
I sometimes try present tense, but I can never maintain it (I switch tenses without even realizing it a lot of the time), but you did a great job, and it really works here, as both reader and character are experiencing David's self discovery/awareness in the same time. It has an immediacy to it that's very potent.
no subject
I sometimes try present tense, but I can never maintain it (I switch tenses without even realizing it a lot of the time), but you did a great job, and it really works here, as both reader and character are experiencing David's self discovery/awareness in the same time. It has an immediacy to it that's very potent.